I think I am the victim of a romance scam: what should I do?

You met someone online. Weeks of messages, tender words, plans together. Then came the requests for money: a plane ticket, a hospital bill, customs fees. Now doubt is setting in. If you think you are the victim of a romance scam, you have nothing to blame yourself for: these networks are organised and manipulate people methodically. A lawyer reviews your situation with you in 20 minutes on Avocat20min.fr.

This article explains how to recognise a romance scam, what to do straight away, how to file a complaint and what you can hope to recover.

The signs of a romance scam

A romance scam, which service-public calls "arnaque à la romance" or "escroquerie aux sentiments", almost always follows the same path:

• a very flattering profile, often a soldier, an aid doctor or an engineer working abroad;
• a relationship that moves fast, with declarations of love in the first few days;
• video calls that are never possible, a camera that is always "broken";
• a request to move to a private messaging app, away from the dating site;
• then an urgent emergency that requires money, by bank transfer, in cryptocurrency or with prepaid vouchers.

To check for a romance scam, a reverse image search on the profile photos often shows that they belong to someone else. One sign alone proves nothing. Several together should alert you.

First steps, without delay

1. Send nothing more. No money, no ID document, no intimate photo. Even if you are promised a refund after the next payment.
2. Alert your bank immediately. Ask whether the last transfer can still be stopped or recalled. Nothing is guaranteed, but speed matters.
3. Contact the issuer of the prepaid vouchers or the cryptocurrency platform you used, with the transaction numbers.
4. Keep all the evidence of the romance scam: screenshots of the profile, complete conversations, phone numbers, email addresses, transfer receipts, voucher codes.
5. Change your passwords if you shared any access, and turn on two-factor authentication.
6. Talk to someone you trust. Shame isolates, and the fraudster counts on your silence.

Do not tell the fraudster that you have worked it out. They may delete the profile or switch tactics, for instance by turning to blackmail.

What the law says: fraud

A romance scam is generally fraud (escroquerie) under Article 313-1 of the French Criminal Code. Fraud means deceiving someone through a false name, a false capacity or fraudulent schemes in order to make them hand over money.

Service-public points out that a simple lie is not enough. In a romance scam, the fraudster uses a false identity, fake photos, forged documents and sometimes fake third parties (a "lawyer", a "doctor", a "customs officer"). This staging amounts to fraudulent schemes.

Offence	Maximum penalty	Legal basis
Fraud	5 years and a €375,000 fine	Article 313-1 of the Criminal Code
Fraud against a vulnerable person (age, illness, disability)	7 years and €750,000	Article 313-2 of the Criminal Code
Fraud by an organised gang	10 years and €1,000,000	Article 313-2 of the Criminal Code
Abuse of weakness committed online	5 years and €750,000	Article 223-15-2 of the Criminal Code

Attempted fraud carries the same penalties (Article 313-3). Abuse of weakness (abus de faiblesse) covers a victim whose vulnerability was obvious or known to the offender, such as an elderly or ill person.

Filing a complaint over a romance scam

You can file a complaint in three ways:

• online, through THESEE, the Interior Ministry's service available via service-public, for fraud committed on the internet;
• at any police station or gendarmerie, which must record your complaint;
• by letter to the public prosecutor (procureur de la République), at the judicial court for the place of the offence or the offender's home.

Bring a dated account of the romance scam, a list of the payments with their amounts and all your screenshots. The prosecutor then decides what happens next: investigation, prosecution or no further action.

If the prosecutor drops the case, or if three months pass without an answer, you can lodge a complaint as a civil party (plainte avec constitution de partie civile) with the investigating judge (Article 85 of the Code of Criminal Procedure). This is often when a lawyer takes over.

The time limit is six years from the facts, since fraud is a délit, a mid-level offence (Article 8 of the Code of Criminal Procedure).

Useful numbers and services

Service	What it is for	Contact
Info Escroqueries	Free listening and guidance	0 805 805 817, Monday to Friday, 9 am to 6.30 pm
THESEE	Report or file a complaint online	Via service-public, online scams section
PHAROS	Report a fraudulent profile or content	internet-signalement.gouv.fr
17Cyber	Diagnosis and chat with a police officer or gendarme	17cyber.gouv.fr
17 or 112	Emergency, threat or ongoing blackmail	Free call

Can the money be recovered?

This is the hardest question after a romance scam. To be frank, the money often goes abroad and is quickly spread across accounts. There are still several avenues.

The bank. In a romance scam, you ordered the transfers yourself. They are therefore in principle treated as authorised, and the bank is not obliged to refund you as it would for card fraud. You can still hold it liable if it let an obvious anomaly through: repeated transfers abroad, out of line with your habits, emptying your savings.

The criminal trial. If the police identify the offender and the case goes before the criminal court (tribunal correctionnel), you can join as a civil party and claim damages, for the money lost and for the emotional harm.

The CIVI. The victims' compensation board (commission d'indemnisation des victimes d'infractions) can award compensation to a fraud victim who cannot obtain it elsewhere and is left in serious material or psychological difficulty (Article 706-14 of the Code of Criminal Procedure). Your income must be below the ceiling for partial legal aid, and the award cannot exceed three times that monthly ceiling. The claim must be made within three years of the facts, or within a year of the final criminal decision (Article 706-5).

Beware of the second scam

After a romance scam, fake investigators, fake lawyers or fake recovery firms sometimes contact victims. They claim to have found the fraudster and ask for fees to return your money. This is a second scam, often run by the same network.

A police officer or gendarme will never ask you to pay to recover your funds. Choose your lawyer yourself and check that they are registered with a bar.

Other money situations

Other money losses follow similar rules:

• someone posing as your bank made you approve operations: see bank impersonation scam;
• someone close to you does not repay a loan: see money lent to a friend and not repaid.

If the payments left you with loans you can no longer repay, an over-indebtedness file can suspend enforcement and reorganise your debts.

When a lawyer becomes useful

You can report a romance scam and file a complaint on your own. A lawyer becomes useful to draft a precise complaint, put a figure on the loss, join the case as a civil party, apply to the CIVI or bring a claim against the bank. They also know how investigators deal with networks based abroad.

No lawyer can guarantee that the money will come back. They tell you which avenues are worth pursuing, and which would cost more than they bring in. Legal aid (aide juridictionnelle) may cover the fees depending on your income. A criminal lawyer answers within 20 minutes.

The official 17Cyber portal also offers a free diagnosis, available day and night.